yes exams are over.
and now i have to deal with non-academic problems that are 100 times worse than academic ones.
you know i have absolutely not hated someone so much to the extent that i can use the word HATE.
no one, i repeat, NO ONE, amongst the ppl i knew had irked me so much that the sight of him disgusts me.
ULTIMATE DISGUST.
everything that he does and every word he speaks makes me feel sick right down to my stomach.
and its bugging me like some mental illness.
can i be a chem geek and use a chem analogy?
its a potential wall with a potential energy of infinity which i will never ever be able to cross.
will i ever have the wave-particle duality function illustrated by the schrodinger equation which will allow me to tunnel through?
or am i forever gna be quantised in this space?
it just makes me reflect on how much God loves me and wonder why He does.
how does He even stand me when i as a sinner CANT EVEN STAND THE SIGHT of another sinner.
i cant stand him i cant stand him!!
i want him to disappear out of my life.
and to have him working under me and over me at the same time ABSOLUTELY SUCKS.
neither way is better than the other.
and to have both at the same time, HAH. my life is ruined.
i really really really am very pist off.
and the other one.
WONDERFUL.
when i say that something has to be done, he doesnt want to.
fine with me.
i have done what i could and if he doesnt take it, not my problem right.
but when the girl that he likes says the same thing, OH WOW.
singapore just snowed.
it was a WONDERFUL MIRACLE wasnt it.
sacarsm x100000.
sometimes i just wished there wasnt so much ugliness in this world.
even i am ugly and lacking and i really hate myself sometimes.
to the extent that i really really really cant be bothered nowadays.
i cant be bothered to know what is happening in other ppl's lives cz they arent interested in mine anw.
okay fine, that is quite an unfair statement cz i know i still have friends by my side thinking about me every now and then.
but at this point right now, all i can say is that i do not have the capability to try my very best for people and the expectations they have of me, like how i used to do so.
there is nothing that i can give to people from my empty pockets.
oh God, please fill me now. the world is just as complicated as i want it to be.
mata ne..
